4/24/2019

Romance or Sex on a first date: Yes or No? 

Sex on the first date? Oh, here is a nice taboo topic that I know everyone talks about, with their friends and a few choice people. But few people talk about it out in the open. So the big question is really, yes or no, do we have sex on the first date or not? Well to tell you the truth, it's all a personal opinion. What if the sexual attraction is there between you and the other person? We know that sometimes when we meet someone for the first time, we get this feeling of wanting sex or romance. There is nothing wrong with it; we need to remember, it is still a feeling and apart of our everyday lives.
 




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So how does attraction figure in relationships? You have probably heard that attraction is a prelude, or a factor towards a relationship. Most probably, at least in the beginning; but attraction alone cannot make a relationship work. It is that attraction that makes you notice a person from the opposite sex, but once you get to know the person more, attraction is just one consideration. Shared values, dreams, and passions become more significant in long-term relationships.

Scientists believe that animals (usually the females) such as insects and mammals send out these chemical signals to tell the male of their species that their genes are different from theirs. This gene diversity is important in producing offspring with better chances of survival. The perfume industry has capitalized on pheromones as a means to increase one's sexual attractiveness to the opposite sex. Animals such as the whale and the musk deer were hunted down for these chemicals.

The whole seduction ritual, in terms of humans, starts by invisible chemical reactions through pheromones which trigger our body to release other chemicals throughout our body which makes us feel "fuzzy" and attracted to another person. In humans there is also a second set of stimuli transmitted to the opposite sex, it could be visual, or auditory Knowing how attraction works will allows us to gain a better understanding to the way "seduction works".

So should I stop trying to become attractive? More than trying to become physically attractive, work on all aspects of your health: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. Physical attraction is still a precursor. Remember, biology predisposes us to choose the partner with the healthiest genes. Where your emotions are concerned, just ask this to yourself: would you want to spend time with a person who feels insecure about him/herself?

- The women's ovulation period - The food that men eat - Perfumes and other scented body products - And lastly the use of contraceptive pills.

Once you have unique experiences to talk about, you will find it much easier to start a conversation. One way you can do this is to go traveling.

To become a good conversationalist, you need to become interesting. And to become interesting, you need to experience many different things so that you will have different, unique experiences to talk about.

The art of seduction is a topic which has been studied since ancient times, the attraction between man and woman (etc.!) seems to drive people regardless of their intellectual state. Societies and even empires have been ruled by "desire" a clear example was Babylon which as we all know was famous for their, shall we say "sexy parties".

The feelings we get from sexual pleasure is a feeling like we get from being happy or sad. Nevertheless, it's still a feeling and that's it, a simple emotion. Do we deny ourselves the chance to be happy or sad? No we don't! So what is the big deal about sex on the first date? It is all perceived how we view it in our minds and what we where taught when we where younger by the people who raised us. Old fashion people will say it is bad, the not so old fashion generation will say it is good.

What ever your choice is, it is the right choice for you. Sexual attraction happens if we want it to or not. Everybody has their own opinion in this topic, just as I do and you do. If you decide to wait for that right person to come along and share nights of sex and romance with, so be it! If you are one for sex on the first date, the only advice I can offer is be careful, have fun and may your experience be as every bit of exciting as you hope!

Speaking from experience, I never did have sex on the first date or even the third date. Sometimes I am happy with it, and the other times I wish I did. Some people view sex like it is love making, not entirely true, well really it all depends on who you talk to. Some people will say that the sexual pleasure you give and receive should be from somebody special. The sexual attraction that is felt for someone is a thing that can not be held back but the actions can be. I guess the question should read, "Do we act on or feelings of sexual desires on someone we just met when the sexual attraction is there?"

Is attraction a matter of chemistry? Maybe. According to scientists, the attraction between animals of the opposite sex is all about chemicals called pheromones. The effect of pheromones in behavior of insects is the most studied to date. It has been observed, at least in some experiments, that pheromones are responsible for communication among same species and colony of ants. The horrible odor released by skunks to ward off enemies is said to be a kind of pheromone. Some species of apes rub pheromone-containing urine on the feet of potential mates to attract them.

"Opposites attract" is a law of attraction, at least where electromagnetism is concerned. But are there laws about attraction between two people? "In a world that is full of strangers" as a line in a famous song of the 1980's goes, is there a clear set of rules that allows two people to fall for each other?

Reproduction is undoubtedly one of our instincts but as we have seen, even in the animal kingdom, the right to procreate or reproduce has to be earned through as series of physical dances or rituals in order to attract a partner, so the fact that we "can reproduce" doesn't always mean that "we will have a guaranteed partner to do it with".

Lately, scientists are looking into the existence of human pheromones and its role in mate selection. There are many conflicting views in the realm of biology, chemistry, genetics, and psychology. Most scientists would assert that these do not exist, or if they do, do not play a role in sexual attraction between a man and a woman. But new researches such as that conducted by Swiss researchers from the University of Bern led by Klaus Wedekind are slowly making these scientists rethink their stand. Their experiment involved women sniffing the cotton shirts of different men during their ovulation period. It was found out that women prefer the smell of men's shirts that were genetically different, but also shared similarities with the women's genes. This, like in the case of insects and other mammals, was to ensure better and healthier characteristics for their future children. But researchers also cautioned that preference for a male odor is affected by:

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Does personality figure in sexual attraction? Yes, but so does your perception of a potential mate's personality. According to a research conducted by Klohnen, E.C., & S. Luo in 2003 on interpersonal attraction and personality, a person's sense of self-security and at least the person's perception of his/her partner were found to be strong determinants of attraction in hypothetical situations. What does this tell us? We prefer a certain personality type, which attracts you to a person. But aside from the actual personality of the person, which can only be verified through close interaction through time, it is your perception of your potential partner that attracts you to him/her, whether the person of your affection truly has that kind of personality or not. This could probably account for a statement commonly heard from men and women on their failed relationships: "I thought he/she was this kind of person."

Take a minute to brainstorm ideas right now. Any type of traveling will work - just try and turn it into an adventure. I'm sure you won't find it too hard to come up with something that could be an adventure.

I know it can be super expensive and it might not fit into your schedule, but you'll grow as a person and expand your conversational repertoire because of it.

Probably not! There is wisdom in knowing yourself: who you are, your beliefs, values, and dreams. And do not pretend to be someone you are not. Fooling another person by making him/her think that you share the same values and beliefs is only going to cause you both disappointments. When you are healthy in all aspects, attractiveness becomes a consequence and not an end. As mentioned in the Klohnen and Luo's research, a person's sense of self-security matters, perhaps even beyond attraction. But remember: do these things for yourself and not for other people. Only then can you truly harness your attractiveness as a person.

Go on a road trip. Go camping or hiking. It's all about the experiences that you can have, the pictures you can show and the stories that you can tell. That's what will make you a better conversationalist.

A small percent of humans have fully mastered the art of seduction and have become extremely successful not only in relationships but in business as well; that is why seduction doesn't only involve a set of skills it can change someone's life entirely. We have established that people act on emotions and that is precisely why businesses rely on this basic method to advertise and market their products to people. Think about it, would you buy a car because of the "brand"? or because you know that if you have a car in particular you will more likely to "impress" someone of the opposite sex, thus earning you better odds to "get lucky"

If we think hard about it, man is driven by emotions and those strong emotions trigger certain physical responses. If we think in terms of basic instincts, we, as human beings only differ from animals by our cognitive ability everything else is ruled by our primitive brain, that is why in the game of "seduction" our basic instincts kick in. Instincts are simply "hard-coded programs" in our brain which serve important functions such as: survival, reproduction, etc. Since they are already in our brain we do not need to learn them, a good example of basic instincts can be seen in normal animal behavior and fixed action patterns.

If you can't afford to go by yourself, or with a friend, consider going on a missions trip through a church (the church will sometimes help out financially - and it can be a great place to meet some girls).

Suddenly, talking to a strange girl will be no big deal once you've been lost in the wilderness, or have taken the wrong train in Europe. Take the road less traveled, and enjoy the ride. Live. Don't be totally consumed with tomorrow and your future that you forget to live today. It's not worth it in the long run.

Now the flip side of the coin, only because not everything is one sided. Sex and romance are two things that should be taken very serious. So, sex on the first date maybe out of the question, maybe a bit to taboo for some people, but it is out there none the less. Having sexual pleasure from someone you don't really know has its own set of risks. Embarking on an adventure of sex that involves two people that are at the first stages of something that can be grand is a scary thought and should be thought about wisely.

Once you've done a few things, then you'll have some experiences to draw on in conversation, making it easier for you (as your stories will come across naturally), and much more interesting for them.

Girls love adventure, fun and spontaneity. And if you go (or have gone on a few adventures), then they think that you could be fun, exciting, and spontaneous.


An important factor which needs to be realized in order to learn the art of seduction is that people are driven by emotions and the "emotions" triggered when someone is attracted or aroused by another person are extremely strong; they can make us spend 80K on a car or simply say "Yes!" to important business decisions.



It took great skill and will power to complete this article on pheromone colognes online. We also request you to use your skill and will power to understand this matter.
Author Dave Thomson
 
 
 


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